inspirations

Recent inspirations, that's all:

Does anyone watch "The walking dead"?! I've only recently gotten into it, devouring the first season last week and I'm now working my way through season two, which includes Otis, a short lived overweight character, who is out of shape and so outrunning the zombies (haha) is challenging. It inspired me! It's makes me a little sad and concerned that being out of shape could affect my survival  (not with zombies of course, but in some other desperate situation where running and such things are vital)

^Found this image on pinterest. WHY then do we (I mean, ME) complicate weight-loss? GAH, these are the basis guidelines we need.


Off to work on a story!

worries.

 

Lots of changes in my life. Changes in the recent past, changes to come:

Graduated from college
Applied to graduate schools
Got into dream graduate programs! Debated options, traveled to schools and finally decided.
Last year of four year part-time job
Leaving New York, where I've lived for almost twelve now
Moving to Iowa City in August
Leaving home for the first time in August
Moving into first apartment! <--excited about this!
Turned twenty-four (getting older=pressure) in March!

It's causing me some anxiety, how my life has changed and is changing. I'm happy of course (so many of my dreams and prayers came true) but I'm also terrified and worried. For awhile, my anxiety even clouded my happiness.

I've been working on my anxiety, reminding myself to be brave and trying to use healthy ways (not overeating) to soothe myself. I was talking to a friend and she wrote me, "Whatever anxiety you're feeling...just embrace it. Anxiety can be a great motivator if you learn how to properly channel the energy rather than allow it to overwhelm you." I was (and still) give myself a hard time about being anxious at all and another friend wrote me, " ‎Alexia, your anxiety is not insignificant. You have a lot of life-changing decisions to make in a short period of time. Maybe having "nothing to do" is exacerbating it, but it's real. Give yourself some credit. All of us would be anxious under similar circumstances."


Here's how I've been trying to deal with my worries:

-Praying more. Spending time each day asking God to help me to be brave.
- Challenging my anxiety into other things, like reading, television, etc. I got a free month of netflix! This documentary--it's about the black man who puppets 'Elmo'-- is very sweet, btw :)
-Trying to spend time with family and friends
-Living more intuitively by decreasing or removing some of the 'noise' in my life
- Exercise<--lifts my mood
- Making sleep a priority. I feel better when I sleep better.

Do you have pinterest?! I recently joined and I do love it. I 'pinned' these inspirations as reminders.

weekly goals

I've heard people say that re-losing regained weight is harder the second (third, fourth, etc) time and it seems to be true! Since January I have been trying to lose weight and it has been a lose-gain battle. In other words, I've been losing the same pounds over and over again.

I've thought about it and I think it was because: I was (still am) more focused on the now part of losing weight and not maintaining my weight and reconditioning my thinking and creating better health habits. So yes, I would exercise and eat decently but it was based on results so whenever I saw results I'd start to ease up on exercise and counting calories so then I'd regain the weight. It didn't help that I've been in a funk for the last few months. After submitting the last of my graduate applications early January, I was too anxious to get much done. And then when responses from programs started to roll in, I was distracted then too. I kept putting off healthy till the beginning of the next week. So now here I am, five months into twenty twelve. I know I can do better. I deserve better. I don't want to waste any more time!!!!!!!

So here are my goals for the next week:
(1.) Exercise most days
(2.) Track every.single.day. and stick to my caloric restriction!
(3.) Make daily agendas and commit to it<--the last part is especially important so that I'm not lying in bed until 11 a.m. My productivity level is so low these days and it's become a problem.

Just three! Keeping it simple. Hope everyone is well! I'm going to go look for someone to eat...

Update

Where I left off…

I visited both Ann Arbor and Iowa City to get a sense of the towns, the writing programs, and the Universities on a whole. Everyone kept telling me that whichever school I picked would be excellent choice (that I couldn’t lose either way) but it was still a hard decision as you can probably imagine. Eventually, I picked the program in Iowa City. I’ve wanted to go there for such a long time and getting in was like a dream come true and at the end of the day I couldn’t say no to the opportunity, especially since so many signs were pointing to that program. I asked God to show me where I should go and I think it became eerily clear!  (Btw, I’m not mentioning the name of the program for my own privacy. But feel free to read up on it here and here) So, I’m leaving New York! Very excited about this since I’ve lived in Brooklyn for twelve years this August and I’d love to try something new. Both Ann Arbor and Iowa City are small towns and college towns so both opportunities would put me in very different environments than what I’m use to in New York! Which is very exciting (and terrifying :) to me! I leave New York in early August.

I’m back because I’ve missed blogging (read: accountability), having a creative outlet, and following the health journeys of my blogger friends. I actually considered if I should come back to blogging. Hope everyone has been well!

30-day challenge

Back in New York since yesterday! I loved visiting the University of Michigan! Ann Arbor, the town it's housed in, can best be described as…quaint? Think Stars Hallow maybe…but less quirky. Coming from New York, the differences (It’s clean! It’s a small town! Etc) are both intriguing and refreshing. Maybe at least for the duration of a three-year graduate program. If you haven’t been reading, I’m debating offers at two graduate program (U of M and Iowa Writer’s Workshop.) I will say that visiting U of M has probably made my decision even harder (it validated how awesome everyone says the program is). Or maybe visiting has made my decision easier since I haven’t visited Iowa yet and maybe when I visit I’ll know how much more I belong there. I fly into Iowa on Monday morning!

I said that I would try to maintain my weight in Michigan but so much delicious food got the best of me. It really could have been so much worse. I weighed myself this morning and I was up 2.6 pounds, but I really don’t believe I gained that much weight. I’m thinking my sodium or something was up.

In other news, I’ve decided to do a 30-day (everyday!) exercise challenge starting today. Even today, it’s already a challenge because my body feels heavier and my head hurts and I’m tired and feeling weighed down. I really just want to go home. I’m hoping this challenge helps with healthy living consistency (which is always so hard for me), weight-loss!, and that it helps me in other ways, like sleeping better and my general mood. I’m going to head to the gym now. I’m hoping to make a 7:45 spin class. Tomorrow!

visiting ann arbor

I left New York on a Greyhound at 10:15 p.m. last night and struggled to sleep (It was so painful to want to sleep but to be jerked awake every little while. Something about the moving bus just wouldn't let sleep happen for me.) Got into Cleveland, Ohio at 6:50 a.m., then into Ann Arbor at 1:45 p.m.!

The wanting-to-sleep-not-gonna-happen part was challenging, but something about sitting in terminals and traveling with people feels really good for some reason. Maybe it's the collective energy? I don't know, but overall I don't regret opting to take the bus instead of a speedier plane ride to save money.

Look what I got with my welcome packet at the University of Michigan today! It's a t-shirt.

I haven't actually accepted the offer to write at UMich in the fall. But this weekend is basically an opportunity for the program to convince the twelve accepted fiction writers to accept their offers. The program is hosting lunches, dinners, etc, with faculty and the current and potential students. They're putting the potential students up in a hotel! Do I love hotels? Do I love lounging in bed in my hotel room right now?! The 'welcome weekend' starts officially tomorrow but I've already gotten to know a few of the fiction writers since we had dinner tonight. The squash ravioli was delicious and the company was sweet, too :)

I want to get back into weekly health goals, so my one goal over the rest of this week is to maintain my weight. It's so easy for me to return to New York on Sunday night having totally overindulged my entire time here. I don't want that to be the case. I've planned to eat 1500 daily but am allowing myself a couple hundred extra calories (if needs be!) since I'm counting this as my vacation! On that note, I'm going to do some reading and then head to bed. Goodnight!

24.

I’m 24-years-old now. Practically in my mid-twenties :)

It’s terrifying and lovely all at once. I can’t believe time has passed so quickly! 

Here are some photos from my celebration last friday: 

 

               (presents!)

       (my little brother gave me money!)

So much has happened in the last year. I graduated from college! I've been accepted and am debating offers at three of the most competitive graduate programs! Programs I never dreamed I'd get into. I always give myself a hard time about what I've done and haven't done but I'm learning to live in the moment and to be more compassionate to myself. I'm leaving tomorrow to visit the University of Michigan. I'm so excited for what else my life brings! In considering the past year, the one big thing nipping at me is my health and everything I need to do to feel healthier. I made resolutions for my birthday and prioritizing my health is one of the first things on my list. I hope everyone is doing well! I'm off since the library is closing. --Alexia